Archive for the ‘Fashion’ Category

Top ten reasons why a man would hang around women’s clothes section

April 1, 2013

I was at Ralph Lauren women’s clothing department yesterday, looking through the pretty, brightly colored clothes trending this season.  I didn’t notice the  approaching  policeman until he asked:

— “What are you doing here?

He was taking notes with a red pen; the same color as his neck, I noticed.

— “Shopping”, I said, a little surprised at the intrusion.

I could see a light bulb go on inside his head. He  tilted his neck  right, lifted his left eyebrow  up, and a smirk filled his face:

— “Hmmm…”, he said. “Here in the women’s department?

Impressed by his brilliant sleuthing, I answered:

— “Yes officer, is this a crime?”

I’ll spare you the details of the heated argument that ensued and in which the rude policeman violated just about every civil right I thought I had. (Full disclosure: I have curly hair and I look ethnic).

The tour-de-force deduction that was on display by that policeman inspired the following top ten list as to why a man would be hanging around women’s clothing section.

10) To buy a gift for his girlfriend, her family, or his family

9) To pick up chicks

8) Wondering why can’t heterosexual men ever come up with clothes as pretty as these

7) Wondering what would Jesus buy

6) He is a cross dresser

5) To savor the fact that he doesn’t live in Saudi Arabia

4) To picture Jimmy Swaggart in a pretty dress

3) To hide  from a drone

2) He is admitting that Fox News was right; these demure dresses are a proof of Shari’a law invading the US

1) To confuse his brilliant, local policeman